When we talk of love, compassion, or forgiveness, it’s easy to think that practicing any of these requires something bigger, more perfect than we are capable of. It doesn’t. In fact, it’s the small acts of love, compassion, and forgiveness that can disarm us, brighten our day, or lift a crushed spirit.

When I was in the midst of despair over the end of my marriage, the kindness of a barista who gave me a free latte for an unknown reason and the warm smile of a retail clerk were just two seemingly small gestures that made my day. In their own way, each of these people I encountered had provided a hand to grab onto from the emotional cliff I felt slipping from my grasp. They didn’t have to–nor could they–save me, just show some kindness.

A recent article in the Beacon-News in Aurora, Illinois, tells the story of an Aurora police officer who saw a child in need and acted–decisively, compassionately, without fanfare–in a way that left an indelible mark on his trainee, the child, and his mother.

The gesture had “symbolic importance. It’s a good sign for this deeply polarized country…”
–Camilo Gonzalez of the Institute for Development and Peace (Indepaz), Colombia

“How important is the gesture of the son of Escobar?” BBC World asked philosophy professor Guillermo Hoyos, Universidad Javeriana. Hoyos said he was ‘very impressed’ with the meeting between the son of the perpetrator and the children of the victims.

“The power of creativity is unique to human beings. We’re born with the capacity to project ourselves into other places. To be creative, you have to do something. It’s applied imagination.”
–Sir Ken Robinson, Author, The Element: How Finding Your Passion Changes Everything

“We know certain factors, including novelty, keeps the brain growing.”
–Daniel Siegel, Executive Director, Mindsight Institute

“Creativity is where we focus our attention. It’s about mental flexibility,” began Chris Wink, one of the founders of the Blue Man Group and more recently the Blue School, as he started the session on Creativity and Well-being at the Vancouver Peace Summit. Then, he launched us off into a performance presentation featuring three “bald and blue” men who playfully illustrated the mindsets or archetypes the Blue Man cast goes into in their performances (listed below with their opposite):

• scientist (logical, analysis)-shaman (instinctive, focused on synthesis)
• group member (sensitivity to others and collaboration)-the trickster (playfulness, breaking free of groupthink)
• hero (moving toward a goal), and innocent (naïve, childlike, focused on being present)

Before each performance, Wink explained that the blue men get centered so they are not in any one mindset, but instead are able to access and move between any of them, something we could all benefit from practicing off the stage.

After taking us through each of the mindsets, he ended with the “innocent” asking each of us to reach back to a time when we expressed ourselves freely–when we ourselves were innocent. “We don’t enter this state often,” he said, “but we need to. We need to connect to our hearts.”

The theme had come full circle–once again–to the heart. Coming back again, and again.

The first day of the Vancouver Peace Summit was filled with flashes of hope, passion, brilliance, bulbs, and recognition. Media swarmed the Dalai Lama and his entourage, though only allowed to take photos in the hall for the first five minutes of the morning and afternoon sessions. Speakers returned again and again to ancient wisdom, basic tenets of religious teachings, and moral imperatives. Still, it came down to each individual committing to personal change.

Here’s a sampling:

• Victor Chan, the founder and director of the Dalai Lama Center opened the Summit with an intention “to translate compassion into concrete action that will make a change around the world.”
• Tom Beech awarded His Holiness the Dalai Lama and Archbishop Emeritus Desmond Tutu the Fetzer Prize for Love & Forgiveness. In introducing the awardees, he spoke of living with the reality of fear and violence and the promise of the power of love and forgiveness-a tension the Dalai Lama and Archbishop Tutu have certainly navigated in their own lives.
• Cherish oneself and extend it to others. -The Dalai Lama
• People often think compassion is passive. Compassion is action.-The Dalai Lama
• Peace isn’t just absence of violence, it’s deliberate avoidance of violence through peace. -The Dalai Lama
• People are so beautiful, but they don’t know it. We underestimate our capacity for compassion. We need to bring that potential to the surface.-Matthieu Ricard
• Children have a lot to teach us. They give us the gift of being able to forget ourselves.-Rev. Mpho Tutu (who accepted the Fetzer Prize on her father, Archbishop Emeritus Desmond Tutu’s behalf)
• Love isn’t what we feel, it’s what we do.-Rev. Mpho Tutu
• Family negotiation is a model for decision making. I know peace is possible, I’ve seen my parents. -Rev. Mpho Tutu
• Cultivate compassion, all day, everyday. It takes us beyond the prism of selfishness…Now, when things are difficult, it’s time to practice.-Karen Armstrong

And then, there were flashes of recognition that rippled through the audience. A woman sitting by author and Buddhist monk, Matthieu Ricard, glanced his way and smiled when opening the afternoon session, tenor Mario Frangoulis offered a rendition of John Lennon’s Imagine and sang the line, “Imagine no possessions…” The two shared a moment of amusement.

Later as several references to the importance of parents in demonstrating and building peace were made by Nobel Prize recipient Betty Williams and Rev. Mpho Tutu, I noticed heads turned in recognition and smiles rippled through Sir Ken Robinson’s family, sitting in front of me.

It was infectious. I came back to my room, looked at a photo of my mother I had found in my suitcase from a previous trip and was glad to be able to share this with her–at least in spirit.

For a glimpse of what went on backstage at the Peace Summit yesterday, check out an article by The Vancouver Sun’s Douglas Todd.

Watch the Fetzer Institute’s Prize for Love & Forgiveness being awarded to His Holiness, the Dalai Lama and Archbishop Desmond Tutu at the Vancouver Peace Summit live on Sunday, September 27, 2009 at 9:30 a.m. PT / 12:30 p.m. ET.

Also, stay tuned to this blog for impressions and updates from the Vancouver Peace Summit.

The Summit is hosted by the Dalai Lama Center for Peace and Education in collaboration with the Fetzer Institute.

“The call of the ancient ram’s horn, or shofar, punctuates the 30 days of introspection leading to Rosh Hashanah and the 10 Days of Awe through Yom Kippur,” says Speaking of Faith, host, Krista Tippett.  “The sage of the Talmud, the 12th-century philosopher Maimonides, interpreted the call of the shofar at Rosh Hashanah in this way: ‘Awake, you sleepers, from your slumber. Examine your deeds. Return in repentance and remember your creator.’ Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur services build on prayers and confessions of mistakes, transgressions, and ethical lapses, both individual and communal.”

In a compelling Speaking of Faith interview, Los Angeles Rabbi Sharon Brous and Krista Tippett explore the meaning of the Jewish High Holy Days. As the “Days of Awe” begin for Jews around the world, we wish our Jewish friends a Happy New Year.

And as Rabbi Brous said in the interview, may we all remember that “there is a Nekudat Tova, there is something so pure and so good inside of you, inside of all of us, but we can’t even see what it is anymore, because we spend all year kind of papering over it and covering over it either, because we’re too busy, because…our lives and our work are too challenging…or because we’re too embarrassed of it…”

When you pull back the curtain on Thérèse Bartholomew’s life, it seems anything but predictable. Despite dropping out of high school at sixteen, she graduated from the University of North Carolina in Charlotte and is now finishing a masters in criminal justice. Why criminal justice? She came to it in the aftermath of her brother’s murder.

A writer and teacher, Bartholomew debuted her first publication, Coffee Shop God, in April and is now working on a documentary film, The Final Gift, slated for completion in the fall.  Both explore the emotional journey she embarked on after her brother’s murder.

“Coffee Shop God shares her personal struggles and heartache over the loss of her brother, dealing with the trial and coming face to face with the man (and his family) who killed her brother. The Final Gift documents Thérèse’s fears, doubts and ultimately, her courage when venturing into the prison to face the man who killed  her brother and devastated her family, to finding forgiveness, compassion, and personal peace.”

It’s not uncommon to wish we’d handled a difficult situation better, especially when it comes to our relationships with our parents. Aiko, a campaign participant, shares a letter to her mother that may remind you of similar experiences in your life. Her mother’s poem almost seems to answer her request for forgiveness.

Dear Mom,

It’s bothered me since your death in 1997 that I was not more attentive and kind to you during the two years you lived with Ed and me. Please forgive me, Mom.

After Pop’s death you had been happy in the retirement home living amongst your peers and finally free from cleaning and cooking. After you fell and broke your hip and came to live with us, it must have been such a difficult adjustment to have no Japanese friends close by and be away from your poetry-writing group and especially your church. Coming to live here after 25 years of Southern California urban life must have been a shock.

Yes, I saw to your daily physical needs but I should have been more mindful of your social and emotional needs and spent more time every day listening and talking with you. I always thought you were a sensitive and wise woman but realized this even more so after I read and pondered your poems.

To forgive myself, I have gathered all your poems and plan to put together a computer-printed book and give copies to family members.

Your loving daughter,
Aiko

My mom wrote senryu poetry which has the same 5-7-5 format as haiku. While haiku deals traditionally with human existence in the natural world in a spiritual or ideal way, senryu looks at life realistically.

“He buttons my blouse
As a way of mending wounds
Our quarrel forgotten.”

–By Sanae

“Last summer, a professor and two students from a small Iowa college jammed 200 teddy bears into a duffle (sic) bag and flew to Sierra Leone. Armed only with books, laptops, cameras, and the bears—which were gifts for Sierra Leonean children—they were on an ambitious mission: to try to teach forgiveness skills in one of the most war-torn places on Earth,” wrote Emile Raguso in a Fall 2008 article in Greater Good Magazine.  If you’re having trouble forgiving a friend, boss, spouse, colleague, or even yourself, you may find inspiration reading how a group of teachers in civil war torn Sierra Leone learned how to forgive.

The Worldwide Forgiveness Alliance, “dedicated to the principle that teaching forgiveness and nonviolence are forces for peace, physical healing and psychological equilibrium,” will celebrate the 13th annual International Forgiveness Day (IFD) on Sunday, August 2nd.

The celebration is designed to honor Heroes and Champions of Forgiveness, Nonviolence and Peace. This year’s honorees are Representative John Lewis (GA), for his leadership in the civil rights movement and his acts of forgiveness and Marianne Williamson, for teaching peace and forgiveness throughout the world.

For more information on the celebrations and their programs, visit their web site.